WEEKLY WEIGHT LOSS
213.2 - 211.4 =1.8
Total Weight Loss
227.2 - 211.4= 15.8 lbs (since 7/14/11)
254.0 - 211.4 = 42.6 lbs (since 11/01/10)
Measurements
DAY 1 TODAY
waist - 48 in waist - 44.0 in
hips - 52 in hips - 49.0 in
chest - 49.5 in chest - 45 in
thigh - 26 in thigh - 25.0 in
L arm - 15.5 in L arm - 14.5 in
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Day 35...............8-17-11
Day 35
Although I don't blog as much as I did in the beginning rest-assure, I am working just as hard if not harder then ever! As you may have noticed by my results, I continue to drop the weight and I feel a lot more healthy!
Lets catch up....For the most part the week has been pretty typical, but there are a few things I feel I need to "let out" I guess. Part of this journey I'm on is not only about loosing weight and becoming healthy on the outside, but also changing some things about me on the inside. By doing that, I have began to force myself to do my best to express how I am feeling, especially if something is bothering me. Although, it hasn't been easy for me because I'm afraid...the results haven't been too bad and it def. helps me.
This Sunday, at a family cookout I was completely ignored by an aunt. I know that her and my mom have not always had the best relationship and lately doesn't seem to be a relationship at all, but to completely ignore your neice when she says "Bye Aunty" is uncalled for and hurtful. I don't believe that I have done anything to her. Although, it upset me I knew that I was an adult and did the right thing by saying good-bye to her.
Also, an even bigger and more important issue that really stabs me in the heart is constantly getting the cold-shoulder from my sister-in-law who absolutely hates me! I know that I've done things in my past that have made my family very disapointed, but I'm NOT that person anymore! In fact, I've strived so hard to never, ever be that person again! I've come a long way in the last two years and feel like Emily and I are in a great place in our lives and it is only getting better. She holds my past against me and there for does not like me. Last Sunday, when she completely ignored me and was rude, that was the last straw. I was in tears when I left the cookout. She talks to everyone else and says good-bye to everyone and bluntly doesn't give two shits about me. It would be nice of her to atleast pretend she may care about my feelings, or atleast say good-bye to me. I felt like I couldn't hold it in any longer, it has been tearing me up inside. My relationship with my brother is already rough, so dealing with her on top of it is just another stab in the heart. I text me brother and first thanked him for the compliment he gave me about looking great. Then I explained to him how much I've changed and I wanted both him and my sister-in-law to see that. From what I gathered from the conversation my sister-in-law is done, there is no fixing our relationship. So, I said I needed to move on and focus on my relationship with my brother because that is more important to me. I know that what I have done in my past and the choices I made have screwed up the relationship we had, and God knows if I could take it back I would in a heartbeat, but I can't! It eats away at me everyday.....All I can continue to do now is do what I am doing. I am proud of myself for getting to where I am today. I hated the person I was before, but I felt so alone and made poor choices to cope with it. I hope my brother can atleast understand where I am coming from and know that I am trying my best now because I am a stronger person. It hurts so much that I don;t have the relationship I did with him before. I think about my mom and how she doesn't talk to any of her siblings, I can't let that happen! My brother said he is starting to notice the changing I've made and encouraged me to continue, which I know I am!
I put a quote up on Facebook the other night that I will continue to live by...."I can't change others, I can only continue to make my own positive changes." ~Me
So, even though the relationship with my brother isn't near where I want it to be, I feel better that I have atleast expressed how I felt. It will be up to him as to how he uses that information. The last thing I want to do is cause any harm in his marriage simply because I would like to have a relationship with him. I can't make him change, I can only express how I am feeling. I am going to continue to work on my relationship with him....I will never stop trying. I don't see him often and he bases his judgements on what he hears from others, rather then from me. I want him to be able to talk to me, and ask me what is going on. I know he has tried before (2 years ago) and I snapped at him, but I'm NOT THAT person anymore and THAT'S what I need to show him. I would love more then anything to have him and his family over to my place for dinner, so they can see how well I'm doing.....maybe one day, but as I see it now I can't hold my breath for it.
With aaaalllllll that said, through it all......I am happy to say.....I did NOT use food to comfort me!!! I spoke my feelings and used my support system to my advantage! I want to thank all of you who have continued to encourage me through-out this process, it means more then you will ever know!
I also want to thank my sister, her encouragement and weightloss success has been such an inspiration to me. I love my sister so much, and am so proud of her! I've always looked up to her and I see just how strong she really is! I think this journey for both of us is slowly making us closer and I try to embrace that as much as possible! I love you Sis! I know I messed up.....I know! Like I said I can't take it back, but I'm truly doing my best now to be the best person I can be for both Emily and I. I hope you know that? I hope someone sees it......all I can do is do it for myself....I can see it! I'm starting to actually love myself as a person....it's been a very very long time since I've felt this way. I probably haven't loved myself since 2002 right before meeting Larry. I'm just beginning to feel that way and know that it will come in time.....
Thanks Again everyone :)
Although I don't blog as much as I did in the beginning rest-assure, I am working just as hard if not harder then ever! As you may have noticed by my results, I continue to drop the weight and I feel a lot more healthy!
Lets catch up....For the most part the week has been pretty typical, but there are a few things I feel I need to "let out" I guess. Part of this journey I'm on is not only about loosing weight and becoming healthy on the outside, but also changing some things about me on the inside. By doing that, I have began to force myself to do my best to express how I am feeling, especially if something is bothering me. Although, it hasn't been easy for me because I'm afraid...the results haven't been too bad and it def. helps me.
This Sunday, at a family cookout I was completely ignored by an aunt. I know that her and my mom have not always had the best relationship and lately doesn't seem to be a relationship at all, but to completely ignore your neice when she says "Bye Aunty" is uncalled for and hurtful. I don't believe that I have done anything to her. Although, it upset me I knew that I was an adult and did the right thing by saying good-bye to her.
Also, an even bigger and more important issue that really stabs me in the heart is constantly getting the cold-shoulder from my sister-in-law who absolutely hates me! I know that I've done things in my past that have made my family very disapointed, but I'm NOT that person anymore! In fact, I've strived so hard to never, ever be that person again! I've come a long way in the last two years and feel like Emily and I are in a great place in our lives and it is only getting better. She holds my past against me and there for does not like me. Last Sunday, when she completely ignored me and was rude, that was the last straw. I was in tears when I left the cookout. She talks to everyone else and says good-bye to everyone and bluntly doesn't give two shits about me. It would be nice of her to atleast pretend she may care about my feelings, or atleast say good-bye to me. I felt like I couldn't hold it in any longer, it has been tearing me up inside. My relationship with my brother is already rough, so dealing with her on top of it is just another stab in the heart. I text me brother and first thanked him for the compliment he gave me about looking great. Then I explained to him how much I've changed and I wanted both him and my sister-in-law to see that. From what I gathered from the conversation my sister-in-law is done, there is no fixing our relationship. So, I said I needed to move on and focus on my relationship with my brother because that is more important to me. I know that what I have done in my past and the choices I made have screwed up the relationship we had, and God knows if I could take it back I would in a heartbeat, but I can't! It eats away at me everyday.....All I can continue to do now is do what I am doing. I am proud of myself for getting to where I am today. I hated the person I was before, but I felt so alone and made poor choices to cope with it. I hope my brother can atleast understand where I am coming from and know that I am trying my best now because I am a stronger person. It hurts so much that I don;t have the relationship I did with him before. I think about my mom and how she doesn't talk to any of her siblings, I can't let that happen! My brother said he is starting to notice the changing I've made and encouraged me to continue, which I know I am!
I put a quote up on Facebook the other night that I will continue to live by...."I can't change others, I can only continue to make my own positive changes." ~Me
So, even though the relationship with my brother isn't near where I want it to be, I feel better that I have atleast expressed how I felt. It will be up to him as to how he uses that information. The last thing I want to do is cause any harm in his marriage simply because I would like to have a relationship with him. I can't make him change, I can only express how I am feeling. I am going to continue to work on my relationship with him....I will never stop trying. I don't see him often and he bases his judgements on what he hears from others, rather then from me. I want him to be able to talk to me, and ask me what is going on. I know he has tried before (2 years ago) and I snapped at him, but I'm NOT THAT person anymore and THAT'S what I need to show him. I would love more then anything to have him and his family over to my place for dinner, so they can see how well I'm doing.....maybe one day, but as I see it now I can't hold my breath for it.
With aaaalllllll that said, through it all......I am happy to say.....I did NOT use food to comfort me!!! I spoke my feelings and used my support system to my advantage! I want to thank all of you who have continued to encourage me through-out this process, it means more then you will ever know!
I also want to thank my sister, her encouragement and weightloss success has been such an inspiration to me. I love my sister so much, and am so proud of her! I've always looked up to her and I see just how strong she really is! I think this journey for both of us is slowly making us closer and I try to embrace that as much as possible! I love you Sis! I know I messed up.....I know! Like I said I can't take it back, but I'm truly doing my best now to be the best person I can be for both Emily and I. I hope you know that? I hope someone sees it......all I can do is do it for myself....I can see it! I'm starting to actually love myself as a person....it's been a very very long time since I've felt this way. I probably haven't loved myself since 2002 right before meeting Larry. I'm just beginning to feel that way and know that it will come in time.....
Thanks Again everyone :)
Weight UPDATE
WEEKLY WEIGHT LOSS
215.6 - 213.2 =2.4 lbs
Total Weight Loss
227.2 - 213.2= 14 lbs (since 7/14/11)
254.0 - 213.2 = 40.8 lbs (since 11/01/10)
Measurements
DAY 1 TODAY
waist - 48 in waist - 45.0 in
hips - 52 in hips - 49.0 in
chest - 49.5 in chest - 46.5 in
thigh - 26 in thigh - 25.0 in
L arm - 15.5 in L arm - 15.0 in
215.6 - 213.2 =2.4 lbs
Total Weight Loss
227.2 - 213.2= 14 lbs (since 7/14/11)
254.0 - 213.2 = 40.8 lbs (since 11/01/10)
Measurements
DAY 1 TODAY
waist - 48 in waist - 45.0 in
hips - 52 in hips - 49.0 in
chest - 49.5 in chest - 46.5 in
thigh - 26 in thigh - 25.0 in
L arm - 15.5 in L arm - 15.0 in
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Day 28...............8-10-11
Day 28
Well I haven't been on much due to being so busy! School has now taken up a good chunk of my life, and it's only just begun! It's OK though - I know it won't be forever.
So, as you may have noticed I have been doing well for myself. I've just made it through my first month on my journey to a healthier life and have lost almost 12 lbs in a month. Although I've have moments that I am extremely proud of myself, overall I'm still not there yet. I know that I could have done better. My main goal I would like to work on this month is go create a set exercising schedule. I was going very well in the beginning, but recently having been doing so much. I was doing pretty well up until about a week ago. I started slowing down with my workouts and last Sunday everything came to a hault. I was coming out of my parents camper and as I stepped onto the deck (with flip-flops) I slipped and almost fell. Although I was able to catch myself, I twisted my back. Because of the pain factor I hadn't exercised for a few days. Yesterday Emily and I went for a walk that was about 1.5 miles and we also played the wii for a bit. I know my back will be a constant issue for me, so I need to find a way to work around that. My back hurts whether I work out or not, so I don't want to start using it as an excuse.
I have done very well as far as my eating goes. I'm beginning to learn how to listen to what my body is telling me. It's a process I'm still working on and will continue working on, but has definately gotten better. I think out of the 28 days I've been doing this I know of only 1 day that I maybe ate more than I should have even though it wasn't anything too unhealthy. It was more about portion control or lack there of!
I know that my weightloss will start to slow down, so I want to try to create ways to trick my body each week into thinking I'm starting a new "diet" I'm not quite sure how to do that. It may just be a matter of changing my workout routine. Any suggestions would be helpful. OK, off to workout with Jillian from Biggest Loser for the Wii :)
Well I haven't been on much due to being so busy! School has now taken up a good chunk of my life, and it's only just begun! It's OK though - I know it won't be forever.
So, as you may have noticed I have been doing well for myself. I've just made it through my first month on my journey to a healthier life and have lost almost 12 lbs in a month. Although I've have moments that I am extremely proud of myself, overall I'm still not there yet. I know that I could have done better. My main goal I would like to work on this month is go create a set exercising schedule. I was going very well in the beginning, but recently having been doing so much. I was doing pretty well up until about a week ago. I started slowing down with my workouts and last Sunday everything came to a hault. I was coming out of my parents camper and as I stepped onto the deck (with flip-flops) I slipped and almost fell. Although I was able to catch myself, I twisted my back. Because of the pain factor I hadn't exercised for a few days. Yesterday Emily and I went for a walk that was about 1.5 miles and we also played the wii for a bit. I know my back will be a constant issue for me, so I need to find a way to work around that. My back hurts whether I work out or not, so I don't want to start using it as an excuse.
I have done very well as far as my eating goes. I'm beginning to learn how to listen to what my body is telling me. It's a process I'm still working on and will continue working on, but has definately gotten better. I think out of the 28 days I've been doing this I know of only 1 day that I maybe ate more than I should have even though it wasn't anything too unhealthy. It was more about portion control or lack there of!
I know that my weightloss will start to slow down, so I want to try to create ways to trick my body each week into thinking I'm starting a new "diet" I'm not quite sure how to do that. It may just be a matter of changing my workout routine. Any suggestions would be helpful. OK, off to workout with Jillian from Biggest Loser for the Wii :)
Weight UPDATE
WEEKLY WEIGHT LOSS
216.8 - 215.6 = 1.2 lbs
Total Weight Loss
227.2 - 215.6= 11.6 lbs (since 7/14/11)
254.0 - 216.8 = 38.4 lbs (since 11/01/10)
Measurements
DAY 1 TODAY
waist - 48 in waist - 45.5 in
hips - 52 in hips - 49.5 in
chest - 49.5 in chest - 46.5 in
thigh - 26 in thigh - 25.5 in
L arm - 15.5 in L arm - 15.0 in
216.8 - 215.6 = 1.2 lbs
Total Weight Loss
227.2 - 215.6= 11.6 lbs (since 7/14/11)
254.0 - 216.8 = 38.4 lbs (since 11/01/10)
Measurements
DAY 1 TODAY
waist - 48 in waist - 45.5 in
hips - 52 in hips - 49.5 in
chest - 49.5 in chest - 46.5 in
thigh - 26 in thigh - 25.5 in
L arm - 15.5 in L arm - 15.0 in
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
Weight UPDATE
WEEKLY WEIGHT LOSS
220.0 - 216.8 = 3.2 lbs
Total Weight Loss
227.2 - 216.8 = 10.4 lbs (since 7/14/11)
254.0 - 216.8 = 37.2 lbs (since 11/01/10)
Measurements
DAY 1 TODAY
waist - 48 in waist - 45.5 in
hips - 52 in hips - 49.5 in
chest - 49.5 in chest - 46.5 in
thigh - 26 in thigh - 25.5 in
L arm - 15.5 in L arm - 15.0 in
220.0 - 216.8 = 3.2 lbs
Total Weight Loss
227.2 - 216.8 = 10.4 lbs (since 7/14/11)
254.0 - 216.8 = 37.2 lbs (since 11/01/10)
Measurements
DAY 1 TODAY
waist - 48 in waist - 45.5 in
hips - 52 in hips - 49.5 in
chest - 49.5 in chest - 46.5 in
thigh - 26 in thigh - 25.5 in
L arm - 15.5 in L arm - 15.0 in
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
A Letter to Myself..........8-2-11
I got this creative idea from another weightloss post I have read that has inspired me. I'm going to take a few moments to be selfish and write a letter to myself. I think it will help me through my journey as I go along. I can look at it when I'm having a tough time. Here goes.....
Dear Kim,
Now is not the time to give up! You have not come this far to give up now - keep your head held high, because you ARE a strong woman dispite how you may feel right now! You have so much you want to accomplish, and what happened to those goals you have had for so long? Are you gonna let those goals just fly out the window sinply because you it a road block? You are on your way towards a great future! How many years have you spent treating your body as though it was a garbage disposal - is that what you want to go back to? If I know you as well as I think I do that answer is absolutely not! You are a stronger woman then you give yourself credit for - I know that you are not one to express how you are feeling, but now is the time to start. Think of it as part of your journey, your road to success! It's not just you anymore, think about Emily. She deserves this too. She loves you unconditionaly and wants the best for you. You are a wonderful mother who would give the world to your child if you could, why not feel the same about yourself? You have to love yourself before loving anyone else. Remember Emily's birthday party? Remember how strong you were?!?! You watched everyone else eat chips and dip, doritos, chips and salsa, cheese balls, crackers, cheeseburgers, potato salad, beans, cupcakes, and ice cream. What did you do? You planned ahead and brought healthy alternatives like a turkey burger and whole wheat bread. You ate a salad and stuck to snacking on vegatables. You didn't even think twice about trying to eat a cupcake. DO you realize just how amazing that is for a woman like you who was completely addicted to food more then anyone will ever know? If you don't I'm going to tell you now and read it over and over if you need to! YOU ARE AN AMAZING WOMAN!!!!! If you can't see that then let me try a different approach. What are the benefits to this amazing lifestyle change you are embarking on? Well first and foremost, you are extending your life. I know you want more than anything to see your daughter get married and create her own family and I know she wants you there too. Not only does Emily want you, she needs you Kim! If that isn't enough for you here is another benefit - living a life without diabetes. As you already know diabetes runs in your family. You've seen people struggle with diabetes before, is that what you want for yourself? I don't think so. Yet another benefit - CONFIDENCE....I know that has been a struggle for you most of your life. If I know you well enough, just seeing the word confidence will put that determination and drive right back into you. I could go on and on about the benefits living a healthy lifestyle will give you, but I'm going to leave you with one last thing. You are a woman who genuinely cares for others by nature, and one who struggles to often care for yourself, so.....by doing this for yourself think of the men and women you could inspire. There are people out there who struggle just like you do. How happy would it make you just to change even one persons life - not even changing, but maybe saving!!!! Isn't that something you have always inspired to do - help others?!?! You are accomplishing your goals right now, you can do this! I promise you that in the end, although it may be painful both physically and emotionally, you WILL come out on top. Think back to June of 2003, weighing it at 160, you felt on top of the world! Bring yourself back to that place. Close your eyes and remember how that felt......AMAZING right? You CAN get there! Remember, I love you and always will love you. YOU ARE AN AMAZING, SPECTACULAR, CREATIVE, and SPECIAL woman who deserves the best!
Love Always and Forever,
Kim <3
Dear Kim,
Now is not the time to give up! You have not come this far to give up now - keep your head held high, because you ARE a strong woman dispite how you may feel right now! You have so much you want to accomplish, and what happened to those goals you have had for so long? Are you gonna let those goals just fly out the window sinply because you it a road block? You are on your way towards a great future! How many years have you spent treating your body as though it was a garbage disposal - is that what you want to go back to? If I know you as well as I think I do that answer is absolutely not! You are a stronger woman then you give yourself credit for - I know that you are not one to express how you are feeling, but now is the time to start. Think of it as part of your journey, your road to success! It's not just you anymore, think about Emily. She deserves this too. She loves you unconditionaly and wants the best for you. You are a wonderful mother who would give the world to your child if you could, why not feel the same about yourself? You have to love yourself before loving anyone else. Remember Emily's birthday party? Remember how strong you were?!?! You watched everyone else eat chips and dip, doritos, chips and salsa, cheese balls, crackers, cheeseburgers, potato salad, beans, cupcakes, and ice cream. What did you do? You planned ahead and brought healthy alternatives like a turkey burger and whole wheat bread. You ate a salad and stuck to snacking on vegatables. You didn't even think twice about trying to eat a cupcake. DO you realize just how amazing that is for a woman like you who was completely addicted to food more then anyone will ever know? If you don't I'm going to tell you now and read it over and over if you need to! YOU ARE AN AMAZING WOMAN!!!!! If you can't see that then let me try a different approach. What are the benefits to this amazing lifestyle change you are embarking on? Well first and foremost, you are extending your life. I know you want more than anything to see your daughter get married and create her own family and I know she wants you there too. Not only does Emily want you, she needs you Kim! If that isn't enough for you here is another benefit - living a life without diabetes. As you already know diabetes runs in your family. You've seen people struggle with diabetes before, is that what you want for yourself? I don't think so. Yet another benefit - CONFIDENCE....I know that has been a struggle for you most of your life. If I know you well enough, just seeing the word confidence will put that determination and drive right back into you. I could go on and on about the benefits living a healthy lifestyle will give you, but I'm going to leave you with one last thing. You are a woman who genuinely cares for others by nature, and one who struggles to often care for yourself, so.....by doing this for yourself think of the men and women you could inspire. There are people out there who struggle just like you do. How happy would it make you just to change even one persons life - not even changing, but maybe saving!!!! Isn't that something you have always inspired to do - help others?!?! You are accomplishing your goals right now, you can do this! I promise you that in the end, although it may be painful both physically and emotionally, you WILL come out on top. Think back to June of 2003, weighing it at 160, you felt on top of the world! Bring yourself back to that place. Close your eyes and remember how that felt......AMAZING right? You CAN get there! Remember, I love you and always will love you. YOU ARE AN AMAZING, SPECTACULAR, CREATIVE, and SPECIAL woman who deserves the best!
Love Always and Forever,
Kim <3
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